SpaceClear Reflections

Press “Pause,” Step Back

Posted on 17. Jul, 2009 by Stephanie Bennett Vogt in Blog Favorites, Clearing, Clutter, Cultivating, Ease & Simplicity, Illuminating, Mindfulness, Nourishing Self-Care, Practices & Tips, Related Writings, Ruminations, Spacious Detachment, The Journey, Your Spacious Self

This just came in the newsfeed from my new SpaceClear Page on Facebook. There couldn’t be a more perfect way to introduce the first (of five) ways to ease the side-effects of clearing clutter which I promised in my last post*:

“I am decluttering a relative’s home who has dementia. It is making me angry and sick. Help!”

If your first reaction was: “Why is Stephanie using this example? I mean really…Dementia?…” I would invite you to pause for a second and notice how you’re feeling. Notice if you’re resisting because you’re really not interested, or resisting because there’s something in these words that are disturbing or moving you in some way.

My split-second process when I first read the Facebook note [slowed down for demo purposes here]: First was a gulp and a tightness in my throat…then the thought omigod, how great someone wrote in besides me!… then an overwhelming wave of sadness.

Buttons get pressed all the time, especially when we are not aware. The minute we get jangled by something, the choice is always the same: we can react or respond.

We can react by resisting, recoiling, feeling pissed, holding a grudge, denying, ranting, raging, tantruming, binging, feeling sorry for ourselves…OR…

We can respond by experiencing [accepting, allowing, feeling] these same weather patterns fully and completely, to the degree that we can handle them – with no attachment.

Sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Not easy for us plugged-in humans. When we’re carrying around a lot of pain from our past (aka clutter), it’s hard to pause and take that one step back into being the compassionate witness. Detachment is not something we “get” overnight. It’s a practice that requires awareness and acceptance, courage and compassion – one step, drawer, moment at a time.

So next time you notice another bout of weather moving through in your journey, take it as a good sign: a sign that energy is shifting. Begin by allowing this weather to come through to the degree that you can handle it. If it’s clammy hands, notice them. If it’s resistance, experience it. If it’s nausea, feel it. If it’s tears, shed them. If it’s shame, embrace it. If it’s grief, allow it.

As you experience each wave of weather, do your best not to take any of it personally. Remember it is just energy. The less you personalize these symptoms the quicker they pass.

*Learn 5 ways to ease the symptoms and support a successful clearing practice in these five blog posts [located sequentially in the Archives for July 2009, or found individually by entering titles in the Search box]:

• Press Pause, Step Back
• Reduce and Repeat
• Soak in Salt and Soda
• Refresh and Beautify with Water
• Do Nothing: Reflections on the Art of Non-Doing

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Tags: Clearing Side-Effects, Conscious Clutter Clearing, Gentle Self-Care, Spacious Detachment, Take a step back, Witnessing Presence